Wednesday, October 06, 2004

Who's on First? (Or Perhaps in this case, Home?)

John Venlet of Improved Clinch sent me this link to an interesting post and ensuing discussion on licensing breeding among humans. As I mentioned once or twice before, I am all for mortgaging reproductive rights....we just need to figure out how to do it. This post is interesting on several levels, particularly the discussion in the comments portion. My addition to it would be that I think we forget that children are not property. The author said,
But I hold that full responsibility for the child must be recognized where nature bestows the child. Consent to sex is not a contract to raise children together. Consent to sex neither commits a man to providing for a woman's child nor commits the woman to allowing that man in her child's life.
Unfortunately, that is not how it works, nor is that how it is looked upon by law. Children have rights, and it is frequently left to the law to provide for them. It is not that the man is committed to the woman because he sleeps with her, but the child she has has a right to support - which translates to financial support, as you cannot force someone to love their child (unfortunately). So it is the child's right to both parents, and the state is responsible for upholding that right until the child is an adult. I also disagree that "consent to sex is not a contract to raise children together." Au, contraire. We all know from where children come. It just so happens, it is also a hell of a lot of fun. But just as skydiving may be a contract with death, so having sex may be a contract to raising children with someone. The responsibility is on each partner equally. They both made a choice. And YES, that does mean the man will provide for the woman's child, and the woman must allow the man into the child's life....less for any right or breach of rights for either man or woman, but more because of the rights of the child. (Of course, parenting rights to children exist, but the well-being of the child and the right to both parents is the issue at hand.) Each time I have sex, I acknowledge the fact that I could become pregnant. It is why I am VERY selective as to with whom I choose to sleep. It is also why I make provisions to prevent pregnancy. But nothing is a 100% guarantee against pregnancy when it comes to engaging in sexual activity. This responsibility and knowledge of consequences is not a man or woman issue. It is for each person involved. If a man does not want the woman he sleeping with to become the mother of his children, he best be sure that he is taking precautions ON HIS OWN to make sure she is not. And he better be prepared for the undertaking lest his precautions fail. That is life, ladies and gentlemen. Stop trying to place the blame, and start accepting it. And for God's sake, be a bit more selective with whom you sleep. Sex is fun, but as the good professor puts it, TANSTAAFL.