Friday, September 24, 2004

Born Salesman

I've recently been putting out resumes to try to find a job in my field. While I enjoy being self-employed, the time has come to start putting this education to work. So I sat down to edit my resume a couple of weeks ago - I suddenly realized just how ill-prepared I was to do it. How do you define what takes up the better part of your day? Short fragments that are meant to detail your dedication as an employee seem barely fitting to describe how hard many of us work. Dates, names, phone numbers....who remembers this stuff? Then my favorite....the cover letter. Here is your best opportunity to sound cocky, self-assured, and an utter ass. "I would benefit your company because...." "Because of your firm's reputation as one of the top 5 in the industry...." "My strengths are...." And for goodness' sake, don't ever show that you might be nervous or unsure. Nope. You've got to sound like everyone's least favorite, arrogant co-worker in order to show an employer that you've got the right stuff. Oy. Hopefully this formula works. Otherwise, I might just put an ad in the paper myself for employment. Something like this: "Hard-working, intelligent, experienced employee looking for employer with similar qualities. Good benefits, challenging work environment, and strong business ethics a must. Please apply in person." Think it would work?